ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
