she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
