Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
only if we run a train.
done.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
