Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Randomize
