Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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