Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
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