First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
