grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
