She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
