nut hugger
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
