sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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