I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
