GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
