wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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