i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
