I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
lets start a swedish sibling band together
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
