This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
