My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
