just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
