so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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