There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
