I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
