i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
