in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
