I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
