I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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