i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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