Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Randomize
