well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
