So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
