I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
