Sponge bath it is.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
