Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
