I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize