Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
My liver just had a heart attack.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
