I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
