help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
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