ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
