my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
