I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
