she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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