I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
two words...techno handjob
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
