Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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