He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize