So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
no. you can't hotbox the world.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
it glows. i had to have it.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
