hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
last night I used snow as a chaser
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
