Sry I called you an 8
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
MIDGETS
????
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
