Dual....:-)
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
