Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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