How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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